Maribeth Wilder Doerr

Shades of Healing ~ Creating a Wholehearted Life

#reverb10 – 11 Things

on December 12, 2010

December 11 – 11 Things.

What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life?

I have been working on each of these things for the last several months but I clearly need to continue with the effort.  Some of these things will be an ongoing battle for the rest of my life – it’s easy to say my life doesn’t need toxic energy from other people but some of those people can’t be cut out of my life so it’s a matter of learning to handle them in a better way.

So let’s cut to the chase and get on with it . . .

1.       Crappy Food
Since I wrote my blog post on My Journey Back to Health, I’ve come a long way in reducing my overeating.  It’s a rare day that I snack let alone binge on something.  Round of applause please!  I don’t spend my days thinking about food either which is both a blessing and a curse.  If I’m not thinking about food, I’m not in the kitchen looking for something when I’m not hungry.  However, it also means I’m not planning my meals.  Since I’m working full time and my husband isn’t right now, he’s doing most of the cooking and that entails something easy and usually without vegetables and other healthy foods.

I’m not beating myself up about this; it’s been baby steps and I continue to make forward progress.  Since my husband is having surgery December 30, I will have to resume the cooking which is the perfect opportunity to take the next step into 2011.  I’m spending the rest of the year preparing myself, planning simple but healthy meals and organizing myself for what I need to do so that it won’t wear me out (BTDT).  I’m hoping by the end of 2011, a 50% or greater vegetarian diet will be my staple rather than crappy junk food several times a week.  I can do this.

2.       Fear
I don’t think we can eliminate fear and it does have its usefulness.  What I plan to eliminate – and what I’ve been working on for the last three months –is living in constant fear and worry.  I think I’ve probably already done that.  I include it here because I still have moments where panic rears its ugly head and my tools for managing it are still so new that I need lots of practice and reminders.  METTA!!!  I will continue to practice Metta-fying my fear.

3.       Procrastination
As with fear, I’ve been working on this for the last three months and have make wonderful progress.  I still find myself being swallowed by it once in awhile, but I’m able to recognize it early and switch gears.  I include here for 2011 for the same reason fear is on the list; I need lots of practice to exercise my anti-procrastination muscles.

4.       Clutter
I don’t have a house that belongs on Hoarders but having lived in the same house for 20 years means a lot of stuff has taken root and settled in over the years.  I want to make a better effort to let go of this stuff.  I use my library for reading instead of buying books; now it’s time to let go of the massive library in my home as well as lots of items that are gathering dust.

5.       Toxic energy from other people
I tend to be the box of Arm & Hammer baking soda in the room; I absorb everyone’s negative energy.   Learning to be the air freshener instead of the baking soda is a big goal for 2011.  I can’t cut some of the toxic people out of my life but I can learn how to be around them without letting their negative energy get to me so much.  Still working out the details on this one!!

6.       Starbucks Addiction
The crazy thing about this is I’m not really fond of coffee.  I’d rather eat yellow snow than drink a cup of black coffee, especially something as strong as Starbucks.  I do enjoy a latte—heavy on the milk, light on the espresso or coffee.   Without my gallbladder, drinking a lot of milk makes me feel terrible so giving up the lattes would be a good idea.  I love the earl grey tea but the heartburn it gives me isn’t worth it.

The truth is, I’m addicted to working at Starbucks rather than the drinks.  There is a store less than a mile away from me.  I enjoy going there with my laptop to work.  With my husband at home most of the day, this is where I can be focused and really crank out something.  However, with my husband not working, Starbucks is really out of our budget right now.  And I HATE coming home smelling like stale coffee.  My laptop bag reeks!

My library doesn’t have wifi so I’m at a loss of where else to go.  Yesterday, I closed my office door so I wouldn’t be interrupted over and over and whattaya know?  I didn’t die of claustrophobia–so maybe I’ll start there!

7.       Workaholic Days
As any self-employed person will tell you, there are days where you work and work and work – and you’re grateful for that because it means earning a living.  And as any work-at-home person will tell you, it’s hard to close the door to the office and forget about work for a few hours, especially in this age of laptops, netbooks, wifi and smartphones.  There is no 8 to 5 for self-employed work at home people!

The last time I was away from home overnight was in August 2006 – four years ago!  I don’t remember the last vacation.  Some of that is monetary, some is lack of a dog sitter, and some is feeling like my business will fall apart if I don’t monitor it constantly.

My goal for 2011 is to completely unplug on Sundays.  If the server crashes or something, OH WELL.  The world will not end.  I want to schedule regular time off as well.  In fact, I ought to just get the calendar out right now.  Taking breaks will amp up my enthusiasm for my business, and my health will thank me profusely.  Goodbye workaholic days!

8.       Worst Case Scenario Game
I come from a long line of worriers who imagine the worst case scenario in everything, no matter how mundane.  I’ve spent my life learning how to let go of worry, and I’ve done a good job most of the time.  However, I’ve learned how to catastrophize things from the master of the worst case scenario game.  (Mom, I love you but you’re not only an expert at this, I think you invented the game.)   If we’re struggling with something, I don’t imagine the worst.  My problem comes when we’re trying to plan something.  In that case, I tend to think of everything that could go wrong rather than the amazing adventures we could have.  My youngest son points this out to me and that helps me get out of that thinking.   So, I’m retiring the worst case scenario game in favor of positive thinking, angelic intervention, and amazing adventures!

9.       Working too hard to please other people
As a child of alcoholics, I fit the stereotype of trying to be the perfect child.  I still struggle with this, especially with my mom (and my parents have been dry for over 25 years).  I’m letting go of this in favor of pleasing ME.  It’s hard, but continuing to be a people pleaser does not serve me in any way.  Time to let go of it.

10.   Time sucks & shadow comforts
I’ll pat myself on the back and say I’ve cut down on a lot of time sucks and shadow comforts this year.  I used to read novels as a shadow comfort and was averaging over 100 novels a year plus several non-fiction books.  I’ve cut that in half for 2010.  What’s left in time sucks and shadow comforts is checking facebook, twitter, and email too often and spending too much time on them when I do check them.   I haven’t succumbed to the games on facebook but I do tend to check the new games on Sporcle and end up staying for an hour at a time.  At least it’s mentally stimulating!  I’m sure my eyes would like the digital rest by unplugging from the computer more often and that would cut down on the time sucks too.

11.   Eleven?  Eleven!
I think these ten are more than enough for me to focus on for a year!  Oh yeah – I’m letting go of following rules to the letter!  That’s my #11.


Howdy! What's on your mind?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: